Tomb Raider: The 10,000 Immortals as told by Twitter

8:22 pm HelenLJohnson 2 Comments

(http://ipodger.tumblr.com/)

Let me set the scene.

On a dark October night, I came home from work to find a familiar Amazon parcel nestled into the end of the sofa. I knew then what it was, it was the Tomb Raider book I had ordered many months ago. Shaking off the horrors of 'The Amulet of Power', I looked forward to finally understanding what had happened to Lara since Yamatai. I never quite realised as I began to read the novel on the train to work, how ironic that would be. 

Then I took to Twitter...

So take a deep breath, a sip of water and enjoy one Tomb Raider fan's descent into despair and British irony. I thank those who joined me on the journey. It was a long road, but we did it...because we are Crofts.   

It started off fairly normal:

However it went downhill from there:

 
 Lara, the tight arse began to emerge: 


  I then started to doubt the novel's remaining credentials:



By now I was getting quite worried at the lack of weapons and Kurtis ripoffs...



  
Urrghh...Uncle Norbert please don't...


Well of course she is...they keep spelling her name wrong in Starbucks. IT'S LARA NOT LAURA!
 



(Tombraiders.net)

No treasure for you Lara....


*Spoiler* It never was, and will never be.

Bomchikawawa...

At this stage, I was hoping it would magically turn into an Assassin's Creed book...

 Seriously Lara, you've known this for years...

 
About bloody time Lara 'oh my god, why are you shooting him' Croft.

What's a masters degree without a 9mm strapped to your leg? Come on people...

Honestly the bag was the most exciting moment in about ten chapters...

 Bet she didn't...

Choo, Choo

If you have anymore suggestions of video game books that you want me to read on the train, let me know in the comments. I'll read them, so you don't have to.
Review of Tomb Raider: 10,000 Immortals coming soon!

2 comments :

  1. Hah, great review! If you're interested, there's a novel called Deus Ex: Icarus Effect that ties in to Deus Ex: Human Revolution. At the very least, it'll be better than this!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Assassin’s Creed Syndicate is the boss in 2016 not Tomb raider !! http://www.th3games.com/2016/01/rise-of-tomb-raider.html

    ReplyDelete